Baker, Tataramoa and Nebbes
Baker, Tataramoa and Nebbes (BTN) is a top-notch law firm that Viacom uses when their in-house legal team is too busy terrorizing law-abiding Internets-Americans, like the Wikiality.com. History The history of this firm is shrouded in mystery, as is their beef against the Wikiality.com. Some believe that the law firm may have been secretly created by wikip*dia, to get revenge against the heroes of truthiness for vandalizing their precious piece of the internets. Others believe that maybe The Baby Satan had something to do with their formation. We may never know. The Logo If you noticed the logo that appears to say BTS does not reflect the names of the principals, Baker, Tataramoa and Nebbes, you would be right. The logo was originally written in the style of a monogram BTS which is read TBS - and we all know what TBS stands for. When the slimeballs at TBS figured out that people were getting wise to them, they changed the logo to look like BTS and started spreading the myth that Nebbes sometimes goes by the alias "Sebben". Senior Partners Image:RaymondBurr.jpg|Peter Baker, Esq. Image:JohnHouseman.jpg|Raymond Tataramoa, Esq. Image:FredThompson.jpg|Harold Nebbes, Esq. Peter Baker, Esq. Baker - the senior partner of Baker, Tataramoa, and Nebbes - is perhaps best known for having spearheaded the successful legal defense of a certain Chad who was threatened with hanging in Florida in November, 2000. Raymond Tataramoa, Esq. Raymond Tataramoa climbed out of the bush-league when he successfully defended two underaged women who were in posession of fake ID's and alcohol. As it turned out, these young ladies had some minor connection to a political official. Tataramoa was later brought in as a partner to form a threesome.The "threesome" in question is, of course, the firm Baker, Tataramoa, and Nebbes, and had nothing to do with the young women mentioned in the previous case. Wikiality.com would never (officially) insinuate that Tataramoa had "partnered" with any of his clients. Not that he wouldn't have liked to, mind you... Tataramoa is primarily responsible for the firm's administrative duties, writing poisoned pen letters and frightening little children. Baker and Nebbes have nicknamed him the "manager a trois". Harold Nebbes, Esq. Nebbes is believed to be a pederast, and has been thwarted in his attempts to engage in sexual activity with his daughter. He has been known to use the alias "Sebben." If you have proof, call the authorities (the number is KLondike 5-3000). Associates At one point during the early 1990's, Otcuder Venkman, the Hungarian legal wonder, worked as a paralegal at the prestigious firm. He was let go, however, after an incident in the cloak room involving the legal librarian.Wikiality.com has it on good authority that said librarian went on to become a member of a certain truth-loving organization, which later came to the rescue of another truth-loving organization. For once, irony works on our side. Monica Goodling and Rachel Paulose worked their way through college as interns at the famed law firm. Australian boys are hired to call The YouTube to pull down clips from ABC shows. Biggest Cases The Day The Truthiness Died...Almost On April 1, 2007, the law offices of BTN shut down the Wikiality.com internets site, America's favorite repository of truthiness second only to The Honorable Professor Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, D.F.A. himself. For hours the Wikiality.com administrators scrambled to figure out a way to bring the truthiness back from the brink of The Rapture. Contributors were screaming in agony, feeling as though truthiness, justiness, and the American Way were about to be ripped from their bloodied, typing hands forever. Some almost didn't make it. It was by pure chance that a group of vigilante truthiness, civil liberties, and reading materials protectors, the TruthOn.org, was waiting in the wings. With their help, the brave administrators and contributors of the Wikiality.com were able to reconnect the tubes of The Truthiness Encyclopedia™ to the main internets tube. Because of this valiant effort, no heroes were Left Behind. Thank You, TruthOn.org. Go fuck yourselves, Baker, Tataramoa and Nebbes! Corporate Headquarters BTN is located in a penthouse suite in Dick Cheney's famed Undisclosed Plaza. Ongoing Lawsuits The People vs. Stephen Colbert, et al. BTN have submitted the paperwork to bring charges against one Stephen Colbert for participating in on air gambling. During his program of May 1, 2007, The Colbert Report host informed his audience that he had lost a $50 bet regarding lutefisk. Encouraging America's fragile children to wager on NPR-related issues is unconstitutional and we here at BTN will not wait until the larcenous lutefisker is behind bars. See Also * Kamish, Davis, Feingold & Lippmann Notes